my soft spot

just a mom who plays hockey and knits

Thursday, June 14, 2007

Taking care of oneself

Lately, I've been noticing here and there how I'm not taking care of myself. My toilet has flushed slowly for it's-got-to-be three years now, my bathroom sink faucet just started leaking and that's been at least two weeks, I clean the house irregularly, and so on. The dawning realization has been painful. Awareness is good, but not always pleasant.

It has been suggested to me that my recent ex was a good distraction from all this (and implied that a new love interest would be the same sort of distraction), as I have to choose to take care of myself and not have someone else do it ("taking care" versus "caring for"). So, slowly, I am moving out of that mucky place into a much better one. And noticing. Noticing how crammed my bookshelves are and how pleasant it is to go through them quickly and weed out books I don't need in my house for whatever reason. Noticing how quick it is to load and run the dishwasher, and how satisfied I feel when I set it running. Noticing how happy I am when I sort the laundry and it isn't 6 or 8 loads.

It's like waking up from a bad dream. I'd like to stay awake.


At 7:28 PM, June 16, 2007, Blogger Dharma said...

I'm glad honey.

At 9:55 AM, June 18, 2007, Blogger wen said...

that's great. just remember you are worthy of nice, serene, inspiring and joyful surroundings. that may mean a lot of books you love, or a meditation area or knitting corner or a well-stocked kitchen! you get to decide. :)


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